2012: Pain, Misery, and Absolute JOY

A pretty little check came in the mail today. Thank heavens. I don't have to be scraping by pay check to pay check again. Pel Grants save me so much. I have to say though, I love not having any debt. I haven't had any debt in a very long time and it feels SO GOOD.

Last year was NOT an easy one. I had so many issues. Between the massive debt (not too bad but enough that I was not in a good place with myself... I never want to be there again), family fights, boy troubles, and really hard classes it was not a year that I would like to really remember all the details.

However. The best and most important things happened to me in 2012. I grew so much as a person. I learned so much about myself. My relationship with my Father in Heaven has never been so good. And to top it all off, Chad.

I learned he was to come home a year early from his mission because he had a back injury. Of course I wasn't happy that he was hurt or that he had to come back early but I knew that he was supposed to be here. I was excited to be able to talk with him again. To see him. To fully love him. And guess what? I got all of that and MUCH more. I was able to go out to New York to visit him and meet his wonderful and amazing family over the Thanksgiving break. My birthday was spent out there too. He then came back to Provo in December to come back to school and be with me.

The best part about the year 2012 was that I got to be with the love of my life. He will never leave me. He isn't going anywhere. I am not going anywhere. If I were to go anywhere... I would make him come with me. If he were to go anywhere... I would follow him like a sheep follows the shepherd (bad analogy? Very diligently would I follow). He came to Provo and the next place we will live in our lives outside of here will be where the Lord wants us to go. Chad is the best thing to ever happen in my life. I love him and he loves me. I am happy that I can now officially say that he isn't just that boyfriend in Hamburg, NY. I can now say that he is my fiance but I can't wait to call him my husband.

Only a few more months and we will be sealed. 5.7.13 It has a special ring to it now doesn't it?

Perfection in our eyes

I have been thinking a lot about what married life will be like for me. I never thought that I would have a wonderful man like Chad. I never thought I would find "perfect", and honestly, I would still feel that way about a marriage if it didn't work out. That is until I read a wonderful post by my friend Elsha Rae. She posted about how someone thought that she tried to seem perfect when she wasn't.

How hurtful. Elsha is a person. I loved reading her post today in regards to that comment. She took it and made people see what "perfect" meant to her. That is the perfect I know I have found. Here is a little of what she says in her blog:

...That is what is perfect to me. Perfect is making a dinner for two, burning it to pieces and ending up getting Chinese take out. Perfect is sometimes having a messy house because of the hard work and the hustle and bustle of it all... Perfect is having an argument and realizing buried beneath the squirmy tummy and flushed cheeks that you can be naive and wrong, and then laughing about it... And falling in love is beyond perfect.

...Perfection is in so many things that are not noticed... Everyone always says "Its about the little things." I could not agree with that more. 

So a million thanks to Elsha. Thank you for being honest. Thank you for having fun. Thank you for caring enough to say what perfect meant for you, because soon, I will have that perfect. 

I strongly suggest you read the blog post I took excerpts out from. She wrote it all so well and came from a very loving place.

Updates and CAW info

I haven't updated for a long time.

Sorry.

Life is life. School is almost done for the semester. Work is going well. My relationship is amazing and in a mere 10 days (!!) I get to see him and meet his parents. What a lucky girl I am!

I have a test this week. Do I feel ready? haha nope. I need to do some more studying and hope for the best. Wish me luck!

I have decided to be done with my Folk Dancing career at the end of this semester. Christmas Around the World is my last hurrah as a folk dancer! I will be moving on in my major by doing other genres.

Speaking of Christmas Around the World, for the first time ever, it will be in the ROUND!! All of the seats in the Marriott Center will be open. All the way around the stage. I am in three numbers. A Russian and Serbian number with my team and then I am tapping as a special guest in a BRAND SPANKIN NEW percussion piece. In this piece there are six different types of footwork. Tap, American Clogging, Irish, French Canadian, Welsh Clogging, and English Clogging. Wooden shoes will be worn and all that jazz. This is going to be awesome. They are all going to be SAWEET! Also, to sweeten the deal.... We have a lot of special guests this year. One of them being the Utah Aerialists! That is right, we have aerialists in our show! I open the show with the girls on my team.

You can get tickets three ways: The HFAC ticket office, the Marriott Center ticket office, and online at arts.byu.edu! If you use the code Dance112 it gives me credit as to who sold the tickets and if you use the code CHRISTMAS2012 (You can redeem it online at this site: http://ev9.evenue.net/cgi-bin/ncommerce3/EVExecMacro?linkID=byu&evm=prmo&RSRC&RDAT&caller=PR or tell the ticket office about it) for a $2 discount off of tickets!

I would love you all to come. The dates are November 30-December 1. There are two night shows at 7:30p and on the 1st there is a mat. performance at 2:00p. Please come! It will not be a performance you will want to miss!

The Flood Begins

Holy smokes! Two years.... I can't believe it. Joseph Mohrman is home. I have had some messages back and forth with him through Facebook and I am just going a little crazy inside knowing that he is HOME and I can see him soon. Two years. Man. I feel so weirded out today.

And so the flood of missionaries coming home begin.....

Long Awaited Update

Oh dear blog. I have neglected you so much and I am sorry about that.

Here is a little update on life.

School has finally started! I have a good semester course load. I am taking German 101, Methods of Teaching World Dance, Beginning Irish, Advanced Percussive Footwork I am on the Back-Up Folk Dance team again, and I am retaking Statistics. I am also a TA for my friend Kellianne's beginning clogging class. 

I have not had a lot of homework yet but it has only been the first week of school. I am excited to see how things play out for me. 

I got a raise at work! I am way excited about that! I have been working there for just over a year now and I love it there. I just hate that it is so far a way from the rest of the world on campus and at my apartment. :( What a shame. haha

Chad Lanham came home. He came home because of a back injury. He served a very full mission. The stories I have heard from him and the comments and posts that friends from Brasil have said on his Facebook definitely show that he was a great missionary.

Well Chad and I are now dating. We have been since he came home pretty much. However last night we made it official in a lot of peoples eyes and opinions. We posted it on.... gasp... Facebook. haha I didn't care either way, if we did or didn't, but we decided to do it so he could get it over with and let it out to his friends in New York. He told the ones that really would care rather in person or called them before we posted it.

Isn't he just the bees knees?

Prepared to meet God

"If we are well prepared, death brings no terror. From an eternal perspective, death is premature only for those who are not prepared to meet God." -Elder Russell M. Nelson.

Morgan Meservy was prepared to meet God. Morgan graduated a year before me. He had gotten home from his mission in May, just after his brother Blake (who graduated with me) left on his, and just in time for McKenna to graduate from high school. 

Last night, he was driving his scooter and a car hit him. He passed away. When I get more information I will post it. 

My  heart goes out to the Meservy family. Morgan's influence has left a mark on my heart, even though I didn't know him nearly as well as I know McKenna. Kenna is like a sister to me so this is hard for me to not know what to say really. 

Morgan, watch over those you love and continue the work. Thank you for the great and strong example you have left in this world. Your service as a missionary will always be felt.

Blake and Morgan before Morgan goes into the MTC.

Morgan at the MTC

Morgan and McKenna before the MTC

Morgan with his newly graduated sister McKenna

I got the pictures from McKenna's Facebook.

Thinking about the quote from Elder Nelson, I really started to think about why so many things like this have been going on in my life. Friends have gotten cancer, people have died, people have gotten in bad situations. I got kind of annoyed last night. I just cried and said, "Why?! This kind of stuff isn't supposed to be happening to me and my friends. This is only supposed to happen to other people. People I don't know." but that is just it; it does. It happens to everyone. Morgan was ready to meet his Father in Heaven. Not saying that I want to die or anything, but I cannot wait until I can face death in the face and say, "I am prepared to meet my Father in Heaven and Savior Jesus Christ." The thought of being prepared for anything to happen really is magnificent. how may people could say that they would be ready to meet God? I don't think many people know they are.

So what can I do to be more prepared?

Believe, Obey, and Endure

That is what we can do. Thomas S. Monson puts it so plainly.

Believe:

Through the winds of change

Encircled by the clouds of pain

I guard it with my life

I need the warmth—I need the light

Though the storm will rage

I stand against the pounding rain

I remain

A keeper of the flame. 1

May you believe and then may you keep the flame of your testimony burning brightly, come what may.

Obey:

My beloved young sisters, you have the precious gift of agency. I plead with you to choose to obey.

Endure:

Finally, may you endure. What does it mean to endure? I love this definition: to withstand with courage. Courage may be necessary for you to believe; it will at times be necessary as you obey. It will most certainly be required as you endure until that day when you will leave this mortal existence.

I love these words. I need to believe, obey, and endure and I will be prepared to meet my Father.

So remember,

"If we are well prepared, death brings no terror. From an eternal perspective, death is premature only for those who are not prepared to meet God." 

-Elder Russell M. Nelson

Food Glorious Food

I started a food blog today. I had started one with my friend Kayla but that didn't really take off since we didn't see each other as much as we wanted to winter semester. Take a look at my experiments turned success!